I've been thinking a lot about the prodigal son this week. Probably due to it being the lesson this week for the Bible study I am leading, but even more so because we have been living it out in our home. It's part of why I have been quiet here in this space.
Several months ago our oldest son sat us down and told us that he didn't believe in God anymore. That he never really did and isn't saved. This came out of the mouth of the boy who brought his Bible to school for years, who earned the nickname "preacher" for telling others about Jesus, who talked about being a youth pastor. I think it might be the first time I was at a loss for words in conversation with one of my kids. He told us that he believes the Bible is just a collection of stories and more about why he came to this decision. In my head I just kept saying to myself, "Don't freak out. Don't freak out. He will stop talking if you freak out." So I listened.
My only response that night was to tell him that I love him.
He went to bed soon after.
D and I were in shock.
We talked and prayed late into the night knowing that we had begun to fight for the heart of our son in a way that we hadn't expected. It has been tough with him these past months. I would swear to you at times that a "pod person" (Invasion of the Body Snatchers reference) has replaced the son I know. He has been angry and hurtful. I have shed many tears and hit my knees often.
I want to be a good prodigal parent. One that loves him enough to let him go and also enough to be there to welcome him home again.
More than anything I want him to know that I will always fight for his heart.
Always. No. Matter. What.
With open arms either way.
Blessings,
A mother's prayer will move mountains! Praying with you that the day of welcoming him home again comes swiftly.
ReplyDeleteOh Wendy, this pulled at my heart. Praying for your family.
ReplyDeletePraying for you...
ReplyDeleteOh Wendy. I can't imagine! I do know our battle is not against flesh and blood. There is a fight for the call of God on your son's life. I pray all deception would be removed from his heart and that the Lord would visit him in his dreams. Praying God will give you and your husband wisdom during this time. I agree with Stacy. A mother's prayer does move mountains. God bless you!
ReplyDeleteWow. That had to be so tough. I have 2 girls and I can't imagine how I would feel. But thankfully you have comfort in knowing that God wasn't surprised by this and He can do anything. Praying for you and your family. Here from FMF. Happy New Year!
ReplyDeleteYou did good mama. Praying in patience you find hope and faith carrying you.
ReplyDeleteYou did good mama. Praying in patience you find hope and faith carrying you.
ReplyDeleteSweet Wendy! I was so excited to see your little thumbnail over at Lisa jo's - I have missed you, my friend! And oh how my Mama heart goes out to you... will be praying with and for you and your family! I agree with Rachel - you did good! LOVE wins! It's not easy - (I know this firsthand!) but even when they push you away and want the satisfaction of a fight and a battle... Love wins! You have raised him well... he will return and you will all celebrate! Love and hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteWendy, my heart aches for your mamma's heart. I am standing with you in prayer and will pray for your son. I do believe he will come home again. It's a promise from the Lord. Hang in there mama. Love and hugs! I've missed you!
ReplyDeleteOh, Wendy! This is my biggest fear in life and yet I constantly come back to how BIG and GOOD our God is. And so I pray for your boy today and for you and your husband to keep being faithful. So much love to you, dear, dear friend!!
ReplyDeleteOh Wendy I have missed you. Thank you for sharing with us. This must have been so hard to write, thank you for sharing your heart with us. Sending you {hugs} and love. Praying for your mama heart and for your son and your family. Keep loving and keep fighting the good fight!
ReplyDeleteBig hugs to you, friend! I am so proud of you for jumping back into this writing space, and with something so close to your heart! I'm keeping the prayers coming. As I read, I was reminded of St. Augustine, who was much like Paul. It was the prayers of Augustine's mother Monica that brought him back to be a powerhouse for Jesus. Praying strength, hope, and peace for you and for Jesus to work wonders in your son. XOXO
ReplyDeleteWow this touches my heart. My son is about to turn six and I already worry about his spiritual future. I hope you are encouraged daily by your friends around you and by our Lord!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for what your family is going through. I will be praying for ya'll!
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