Friday, April 19, 2013

My Heart Bare


Today I am joining Lisa-Jo and friends for Five Minute Friday.
This is where we come together writing for 5 minutes without editing or overthinking.
I love this community.

Check out what everyone's is sharing on the word JUMP here.

Five Minute Friday


No one really talks about how hard ministry can be. It's known, but unspoken. I am just as guilty of the silence. Sure, I am so quick to jump on here and tell you all the wonderful things about it. But to actually say that sometimes it's hard. And sometimes it hurts. And sometimes I want to quit. No, I just don't write it out loud. Maybe it's because the pretty part of ministry is easier to write. Maybe it's because in those hard moments when I doubt this dream and want to let go of it, I worry what you might think of me. Because I know what I think of myself and I don't know if I could bear you agreeing with me. Maybe I just couldn't bear seeing it in print. It's too much to put on a page. My heart bare. There for all to see. Transparent and glass-shatterable. So afraid of the breaking. To let down this mask and say today was a really rough day is like jumping off a cliff for me tonight. But I had to. Because today was hard and my heart hurts and I am truly at a loss for any other words than these.

Blessings,

47 comments:

  1. Oh Wendy! I can just start out by saying THANK YOU! You made me feel so welcomed tonight and were a blessing to me! I appreciate you for that. Second, ministry is tough...I don't think we talk about it enough. I think we go out fighting for Jesus and don't always get "filled" up ourselves. You are not alone, Wendy. You're loved, you're secure, and God is with you...always. Thanks for sharing your heart new friend. I'm excited to be reading your words and your heart!

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    1. It was wonderful to meet you and I am so looking forward to getting to know you more. Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. Blessings!

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  2. Oh sweet Wendy... how I wish I could gather you up in my arms and hold you tight... there is no need to hide any part of you... you are loved and valued and treasured and we ALL have days like that... days that we don't even really want a Do Over, we just want it all to be Done Already! Praying His arms wrap snug around you and He pulls you close... refreshes and renews... redeems whatever is needed... rest, my friend! Sometimes it is work to enter in to His Rest - but it is always always worth it!

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    1. I would totally take that hug! Thank you sweet friend for your words of encouragement! Love & Hugs!

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  3. Thank you so much for being honest. That really means a lot. I too will be praying and asking for the Lord to fill you up with His joy, even during this difficult time.

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    1. Thank you so much Debi! Your prayers are so appreciated! Blessings!

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  4. Oh, sweet friend...sending hugs and prayers to you. Thank you for jumping out in bravery with your honesty and transparency. You are such an encouragement to me and to so many others. I'm so sorry today was hard...praying God will comfort and bring peace as only He can.

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    1. Thank you so much for your prayers and encouragement friend! Hugs! Blessings!

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  5. Amen for honesty, amen for participating in ministry, no matter how hard or scary. God bless you my friend. I want you to know that you're one of the reasons I look forward to FMF, you are a light in this dark world, and even though you may not feel it today, you do shine. <3

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    1. Oh Megan your words were balm to my tender heart today. I thank you so much. Blessings!

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  6. Oh Wendy, my heart hurts with you. You'er exactly right, ministry is hard. And painful. And sometimes ugly. I'm praying for you sweet, sweet friend. Know that you are an inspiration and an encourager. You are so loved.

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    1. Thank you so much Amanda. Really...thank you. Blessings!

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  7. You speak truth, friend! It is nice to say that out loud. Not so we can have a pity-party, but so that we can be there for one another. Encouraging. Cheering. Praying. Praying for you and your heart. Love your honesty and YOU!

    www.positivelyalene.com

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    1. Love you right back, sweet friend. Thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement! Blessings!

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  8. Dear, dear Wendy
    If I could, I would jump right across the Atlantic into your house and give you a bear hug of love! Go cry your heart out on His shoulder, dear one! That works for me. Thank you for your honesty and sharing your heart!
    Blessings
    Mia

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    1. Mia how I would love to hug you proper! Thank you so much! Blessings!

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  9. Love your bravery. This will ring true for so many....thank you for sharing.

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  10. Bold and beautiful truth...sending a BIG hug your way with lots of love! You are not alone!

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    1. Thank you for the hug and love friend! Sending it right back to you! Blessings!

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  11. Bold and beautiful truth...sending a BIG hug your way with lots of love! You are not alone!

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  12. Wendy, Thank you so much for sharing so open and honestly. Your words are such comfort and encouragement for someone that also in ministry and needs to know that I am not the only one that faces the hard times.

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    1. Amy isn't that the hard part sometimes? Thinking that we are alone in the hard places of ministry? Blessings!

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  13. OH Wendy Love you and lifting you in prayers! Thank you for being real!!

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    1. Thank you so much for your prayers and love sweet friend. Love you too!

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  14. Hugs for you my friend! Ministry is rough. Isaiah 43:1-3. Has been on my heart the past 2 days. He is with us through it all. Cling to His truths and prayers are going up. Thank you for being faithful and honest. Again, HUGS!

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    1. Thank you so much Heather! Your words of encouragement have stayed with me and have ministered to my heart. I keep going back to this..."Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine." Ransomed. Called. His. That is the truth. Thank you for speaking to my heart friend. Hugging you right back. Blessings!

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  15. These words are real. I know well that ministry is hard. I'm so glad that you put these words, few though they are, out for all of us to read. Praying that you will feel held up by Jesus.

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    1. Thank you so much for your prayers Jessica. Blessings!

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  16. It's hard to be honest but in our honesty, God can do mighty things. I love that you let the walls down and allowed your community to surround you. What a beautiful thing to do.

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    1. Letting down the walls to be vulnerable is never really easy, but always necessary. Hoping to get better at it. Blessings!

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  17. Wendy, I am proud of you for writing this hard post. I continue to pray that Jesus comforts your hurting heart and that time will help to heal it too. I love you tons, friend. You are beautiful!

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    1. You led the way friend. Showing bravery in your writing. Thank you so much for your encouragement and prayers. I am so incredibly blessed to be walking with you. I love you right back!

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  18. So sorry to hear this. I know what you mean. Ministry can be the greatest joy and cause some of the deepest heart ache. I pray you feel God's everlasting arms upholding you today! The "catch me" for your jump.

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    1. Yes much joy in ministry as well. It's so much easier to share that part of it. I could write so much about that. It is so much more difficult to write in the vulnerable space of the harder places. Thank you so much for your prayers, sister! Blessings!

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  19. Girl, sorry your heart hurts. Maybe not everyone will agree, but if you need to write, then write! Be blessed:)

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    1. Thank you so much friend! Blessings!

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  20. Reaching out and hugging you friend! Your vulnerability here is so moving. Thank you so much for keeping it real. Lifting you in prayers today sweet friend {hugs}

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    1. Thank you so much my sweet friend. Hugging you right back! Blessings!

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  21. Thank you for your willingness to be real. So often those in ministry make it look so easy that we forget about the hard parts. Hang in there, sister! So sorry about your aching heart. :-(

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    1. And when we only talk about the easy parts, it can make us feel incredibly lonely and discouraged in the harder moments. Thank you so much for your encouragement! Blessings!

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  22. Ministry is tough because we live in a fallen world so our fight is tough. Hang in there and know that God is working the good for His glory. Be uplifted. He knows what it is you are fighting for.

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    1. Thank you so much for your encouragement! Blessings!

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  23. Wendy, my sweat friend and sister in Christ, I hear your heart. I not only serve in various ministries, but work at my church, for the lead Pastor. Talk about never feeling like I can bare my heart. Oh how I understand. Praying that God would draw near to you, affirm you, encourage you and let you know you loved and valued you are. I treasure you my friend. I hope I get to hug you in person one day, but for now, a "cyber hug" will have to do. Hugs!

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  24. I thank you for the honesty! My husband had a similar experience- it's hard to say how you really feel when no one talks about it. Hope you're feeling better! Hugs to you!!

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