Leading From the Second Chair

I am a second chair leader.

When someone first mentioned this to me, I immediately went back to my band days in school. If you were second chair in band, that meant that there had been a competition and you had lost your chance at first chair. Everyone’s goal was to be first chair and there was a weekly competition for it. That isn’t this kind of second chair experience.

According to Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson, authors of the book Leading from the Second Chair, the definition of a second chair leader is “a person in a subordinate role whose influence with others adds value throughout an organization.”

They go on to say, 
"This definition highlights a number of factors
that every second chair must recognize.

A second chair leader is:

◦ Subordinate– not the lead leader, but a follower and a leader.

◦A person of influence– his or her leadership is not based primarily on position.

◦Adding value throughout the organization– he or she has the big picture of the ministry in mind, and is repeatedly willing to do what it takes to strengthen the larger organization.

Effective second chair leaders think, lead, and shepherd beyond the parameters of their own ministry. They think of the whole, care for the whole, and seek to enhance the whole. Second chair leaders are expected to be bold initiators and faithful followers, creative thinkers and detailed implementers. The ongoing challenge is to do a wide variety of tasks and do them well.”

So what does being second chair look like for me today?

I see myself as serving both our Family Ministry Director and our team along with the families of our church. Every ministry leader with a vision needs a team to help make that vision a reality and I am a part of that team. 
I do that leading from the second chair.

Do you lead from the second chair?
What does that look like for you?

Blessings,

Walk With Me

I think that generally when we think of discipleship, we too often associate it with having someone in our lives to encourage us and empower us. I think having a mentor is important, but I also believe that being a mentor is equally important.

One generation shall commend your works to another,
and shall declare your mighty acts.

Psalm 145:4

I think the lessons we teach in children’s ministry are important, but I also believe we have so much more to offer these kids. Being involved in the lives of the kids outside of Sunday mornings is something I am very passionate about. As Paul walked with Timothy, I believe we are called to walk with the next generation following us. They need to see us living out what they are being taught on Sunday mornings.

This may be something as simple as having lunch with them or tutoring after school. It may be watching a baseball game or bringing them home for dinner on a regular basis. The important thing about this time is not what you buy the kids or where you take them, but that you are there – there to talk and there to listen, there to offer encouragement and to give direction, there to pray for and with these kids. We have not only an obligation but an amazing opportunity to invest in the lives of these kids.

I know most of you have a “Paul” in your life, but do you have a “Timothy”?
Who are you walking with today?

Tuesday Tunes




I don't wanna waste a second,

I don't wanna waste a moment.
I don't wanna live my life in chains.
I'm here to make You famous,


And tell the world You came to save us.
I am here to make a change today


For the sake of this generation,
I live for You.
For the hope of the world’s salvation,
I live for You


Today, I'm living for You,
Today, my heart beats for You.
Today, I'm following You Lord,
Today!
Today, I'm standing for You,
Today, I'm looking to You.
Today, I'm following You Lord,
Today!


I live, all for the glory of Your name,
I live, to see this generation saved.
I live, to see Your love abound in all the earth.
I live for You!




Missions Monday

It's time for Missions Monday.

Every Monday I will introduce you to some great charities that you can get involved in. When I say get involved, I mean you can donate your money, time, and/or pray for these organizations who are doing amazing things to help people.

Today I would like to introduce you to

All Hands Volunteers.

From the website:

"All Hands is a non-profit organization that harnesses the power of volunteers to bring direct assistance to those in need around the world.

Our model is simple; we provide the basics so you can do the work. No payment is necessary, we provide the housing, meals, tools and work. You just have to get to us and help.

We respond to natural disasters and global aid needs with a flexible volunteer force. We come in after search and rescue and before longer term sustainable aid kicks in."

You can learn more about this organization and how you can get involved by visiting their website here:

All Hands Volunteers - Website.

You can connect with them on Facebook here:

All Hands Volunteers - Facebook

and you can follow them on Twitter here:
All Hands Volunteers - Twitter.

Me, Mr. Clean, & God

There is one day every week when I deep clean our home. Dusting, scrubbing...the whole nine yards.

This is also the time when I have my deepest conversations with God.

This time is when I pray the biggest prayers for my guys. Making their beds I ask that God covers them with love and grace. Dusting their rooms I ask that God gives them a clean heart. Picking up all the clutter in their rooms I ask that God will remove all distractions from what He has for them.

Now I will admit that when I am cleaning the bathroom I am having a different kind of prayer involving aim with three boys. Moms of sons, you totally get that prayer and may have even prayed it as well.

This is the time that I just talk with Him. It becomes more than prayer. It is a conversation. I tell Him about everything during this time. I empty my mind and heart into this space and know that He hears me.

This is also the time that I praise with complete abandon. I put on some worship music and proceed to dance and sing to my God. I want to be able to do all of these chores with joy and this really helps to make that happen.

So one day a week I have a standing date with Mr. Clean and my God.

It is one of my favorite days of the week.

Missions Monday

It's time for Missions Monday.

Every Monday I will introduce you to some great charities that you can get involved in. When I say get involved, I mean you can donate your money, time, and/or pray for these organizations who are doing amazing things to help people.

Today I would like to introduce you to

Heartwork.

From the website:

"Heartwork is about bringing purpose to our young generation by empowering them to bring hope to the orphan. There is an unsettling paradox facing our world today. As over 160 million orphans fight to survive, millions of other young people indulge in a culture of self-focus and yet still struggle to find real happiness. True life is found by giving our lives away and true religion is caring for those in need. Isaiah 58:10 says, "If you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday." We believe that God wants to use this generation to rescue the orphans of the world, and use the orphans of the world to rescue us. We need them. They need us. We call this destiny rescuing destiny."

You can learn more about this organization and how you can get involved by visiting their website here:

Heartwork - Website.

You can connect with them on Facebook here:

Heartwork - Facebook

and you can follow them on Twitter here:

Heartwork - Twitter.

Purpose Driven Kids



Recently. I have been listening to Rick Warren’s latest series on Raising Amazing Kids. this past week’s message was all about Purpose Driven Kids. In this message he shared the five truths that we need to help our children understand and believe about themselves along with five questions that we need to help them ask and answer.

1. I was planned for God’s pleasure.

What will be the center of my life?

2. I was formed for God’s family.

Who will be my companions in life?

3. I was created to become like Christ.

What will be my character?

4. I was shaped to serve God.

What will be my contribution?

5. I was made for a mission.

What will be my life message?

One of the things that he shared that really stood out for me was “As parents we are responsible TO our children, but not FOR our children.” He went on to say that we are responsible to love, teach, and encourage our kids, but are not responsible for the decisions that they make. He made the point that Adam had a perfect Father in God, yet still sinned.

Rick Warren then shared this poem by Edgar Guest.

I’d rather see a sermon

than hear one any day;

I’d rather one should walk with me

than merely tell the way.

The eye’s a better pupil

and more willing than the ear,

Fine counsel is confusing,

but example’s always clear;

And the best of all preachers

are the men who live their creeds,

For to see good put in action

is what everybody needs.

I soon can learn to do it

if you’ll let me see it done;

I can watch your hands in action,

but your tongue too fast may run.

And the lecture you deliver

may be very wise and true,

But I’d rather get my lessons

by observing what you do;

For I might misunderstand you

and the high advice you give,

But there’s no misunderstanding

how you act and how you live.

You can hear this message along with the others in the Raising Amazing Kids series here: http://www.saddleback.com/mc/archives/

So, what are you doing to live your message out in front of the kids you have influence over? Is the Gospel that you present to them merely words or demonstrated in action, thought and deed? Are you the model of Christ that your kids need to see?

Originally shared at Kidmin1124.

Let's Share

One of the things I love about our kidmin community is the willingness to share so much. Many children's ministries have been writing their own curriculum and have been so generous to share with others for free.

Here are some that I've found:

• Angry Lessons from the Bible - this is a 4 week series based on the game Angry Birds.
• Pirates! - this is an 8 week series on following Jesus.
• God to the Rescue - this is a 5 week series for Easter.

There are also ministries that share many lessons on their websites for free.

• LifeChurch.tv - Open - there are so many choices available here for preschool and elementary.
• Ministry To Children - there are lessons, games, coloring pages, and much more available here.
• Church on the Move - Seeds - there is great music along with some fantastic series available here.

Do you know of any other free lesson resources?

Let's share.



Tuesday Tunes



One Thirst

by

Jeremy Riddle

You say to us seek Your face 

Our hearts reply, Your face we seek

And come teach us Lord, reveal Your ways

Anoint us for the greater things

We have gathered with one thirst and hunger

We’re here to drink of glory and wonder,

Here to cry out

Come and fill this place

Come and fill this place

And our single wish, our sole desire

To gaze upon Your beauty God

We will not rest, nor will we cease

Till with our eyes, Your face we see

We have gathered with one thirst and hunger

We’re here to drink of glory and wonder,

Here to cry out

Come and fill this place, this place

Come and fill this place, this place

We wait for You to come and show Your glory here today.

We wait for You to come and show Your glory here today.

We wait for You to come and show Your glory here today.

We wait for You to come and show Your glory here today.

We wait for You, God we wait for You!

We wait for You, God we wait for You!

Alleluia come, Alleluia come, Alleluia come, Alleluia come!

We wait for You to come and show Your glory here today!

Missions Monday

It's time for Missions Monday.

Every Monday I will introduce you to some great charities that you can get involved in. When I say get involved, I mean you can donate your money, time, and/or pray for these organizations who are doing amazing things to help people.

Today I would like to introduce you to

Hands and Feet Project.

From the website:

"Our vision is two fold. First, we will strive to raise a generation of orphaned children who will grow up to reach their God given potential . Second, we will empower first world citizens to partner with us in service at home and abroad."

You can learn more about this organization and how you can get involved by visiting their website here:

Hands and Feet Project - Website.

You can connect with them on Facebook here:

Hands and Feet Project - Facebook

and follow them on Twitter here:

Hands and Feet Project - Twitter.

Happy Mother's Day Mom

Mom,

You are my inspiration.

And role model.

From you I learned:

Strength,

Courage,

Wisdom,

And Love.

Deep abiding love.

You have given love so freely,

With such deep commitment,

And you are willing to parent us all, still,

And be a guiding light, still,

To all your children and grandchildren.

You have always supported us and helped us.

You have always been there.

The constant Northern Star.

And voice of reason in our heads.

And the one who can listen endlessly to our joys.

And our problems.

Always a shoulder to cry on,

Always ready with a round of applause for successes,

As well as a mini lecture when needed.

And always showing us what it is to say YES to life!

I am the mother I am

Because of the mother you have always been.

I am the woman I have become

Because you showed me what a woman could be.

I love you, always.

With gratitude, your daughter

Watch Me Now

One of the opportunities to serve in Children’s Ministry is as a small group leader. Once a person has observed a service and decided that they would like to lead a small group, the first step is to become an apprentice.

An apprentice is defined as someone undergoing training or instruction in preparation for a particular role.

What does that look like in small groups?

◦You watch while I do.

◦I watch while you do.

◦You do.

I believe that this is based on how Jesus led his disciples in ministry. Throughout his ministry, the disciples watched and learned from Jesus. Then they did ministry with him. Then he released them to do ministry.

Having a volunteer begin as an apprentice is beneficial in many ways both for them and for the team. This provides a comfort level for the volunteer and a hands-on opportunity to see how small groups work. This also gives the small group leader training them an opportunity to provide feedback and answer any questions they might have during this time.

What does training for your small group leaders look like?

(originally shared at Kidmin1124)

Yet Another Slice of Orange

The last breakout I attended at Orange this year was The Private Life of a Public Leader with Doug Fields.

Doug shared that public people tend to ignore the private side of their lives until it is too late.

I think the challenge in having this conversation is that we have a hard time admitting these challenges to ourselves let alone opening up and sharing them with others.

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

Proverbs 4:23 

Signs that you're out of balance:

• cluttered appearance
• low level paranoia
• leave a series of disappointments
• connections with Jesus are rare and lack depth
• skimming in relationships
• easily discouraged

Driven people pay a price.

Driven people are:

• most gratified only by accomplishment
• often thinking about status connections
• rarely satisfied
• likely to shortcut integrity
• often known for the trail of bodies in their wake
• usually very busy

Beware of the barreness of a busy life.

Taking Action:

On Drive

• Make authentic community a top priority.
• Do you have people who know you and can ask the honest questions?
• Ask yourself - why did I say yes to this?

On Time

• I am going to control my time otherwise someone else will control it for me.
•  Realize that every yes to someone is a no to someone else.
• In leadership we need to be picky about what we say yes to.
• Unbudgeted time should always go to want to do and not need to do.

On Study

• Leaders are learners.
• Decide - do I want to study or skim?
• Study for depth over breath.

On Spiritual Strength

• Know your full and empty guages.
• Schedule solitude.

On Refreshment

• Take a day off and make it non-negotiable.
• Unplug.
• When we are connected to everyone, we are not connected to THE ONE.

On Calling

• Be in touch with your own depravity.
• Understand your own limits.



What I'm Reading







Missions Monday

It's time for Missions Monday.

Every Monday I will introduce you to some great charities that you can get involved in. When I say get involved, I mean you can donate your money, time, and/or pray for these organizations who are doing amazing things to help people.

Today I would like to introduce you to

Lemonade International.

From the website:

Lemonade International is a US-based non-profit community development organization working in partnership with local Guatemalan leaders and in solidarity with the people of the La Limonada community of Guatemala City – Central America’s largest urban slum.

Our work now includes six holistic community development programs through which we are committed to working in solidarity with the people of La Limonada to empower sustainable transformation in the community. Future plans include expanding into other barrios (neighborhoods) within La Limonada, as well as establishing a vocational training center and a walk-in medical clinic.

“And if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.”

– Isaiah 58:10

You can learn more about this organization and how you can get involved by visiting their website here:

Lemonade International - Website.

You can connect with them on Facebook here:

Lemonade International - Facebook

and you can follow them on Twitter here:

Lemonade International - Twitter.



Another Slice of Orange

My second slice of Orange was a breakout with Tom Shefchunas called Transitioning to a Small Group Model.

Tom started out by asking a very basic question "What does it mean to transition to a small group ministry model?" There were several answers from attendees, but my favorite was "changing the focus from passing on information to building relationships."

Here are Tom's tips for transition:

Transition the vocabulary.

The first indicator that there is a transition will be the words you use to describe the environment.

Sunday school teacher becomes small group leader.

Classroom becomes small group. One is a geographical location and the other is a relational situation.

Weekly lesson becomes small group guide.

Transition you strategies and your goals, but not your mission.

The Mission - to help a child or student develop a vibrant, growing, mature, personal, powerful, incredible faith of their own.

We want to create shared quality experiences for the small group leader and child and attach biblical truth to it.

Transition the centerpiece.

Who do the kids introduce their guest to when they first walk into the room? This will indicate the centerpiece of your ministry. The small group and small group leader should be the focus.

Transition the volunteers.

The quality of your program will rise and fall with the volunteers you allow to be the centerpiece of your ministry.

Being a small group leader requires a multi year commitment. For middle school ministry, we ask for 3 years and student ministry we ask for 4 years and leaders move up with their groups. This builds relationships.

Transition your program.

The program will move from being the point of your ministry to support and set up for group. The point of Sunday will become what happens with groups. Sunday planning will begin with groups as the priority.

Transition your events.

The event will move from a fun outing to a foundational, strategic part of building a great relationship between the child or student and their leader.

I really loved what Tom had to say about creating a culture for our small group leaders. Beginning with recruiting from vision rather than need and including training and support.

Tom and Reggie Joiner have written a book called Lead Small which I am super excited to read. There is also a new online community for small group leaders of preschool, elementary, and students which I am equally excited about at Lead Small.



A Slice of Orange

My first slice of Orange was a breakout with Sue Miller called Volunteer Meets Parent. 

One of the things that I love about Sue is that she not only speaks from the experience of doing small groups, but she always shares how small group leaders have impacted her family. She shared about how her grandson loves his small group leader and looks forward to seeing him every week. She also shared how a small group leader poured into her son during a very difficult time as a teenager.

She talked about how important it is for small group leaders to build trust with parents. Too often parents can look at us and ask themselves if we are judge or friend. They don't want to partner with someone that makes them feel bad as a parent.

Unique words that a volunteer can say to build that trust:

• I get to do this!
• Your son/daughter is amazing!
• I want you to win as a family!
• What is the best way for me to partner with you?
• Let's ask God to transform your student this year.

The goal for me as a small group leader is not only building a relationship with the child I lead, but also with their family as well. With each interaction I have with their family, I want them to walk away knowing that I love their child and that I want to partner with them by being that additional voice in the life of their child.

Orange in Pictures

For the rest of the week I will be sharing more of my Orange 2012 experience.

I thought I would begin in pictures.